Hailey: Hey Johnny, you are looking extra cool today yeah! I am sure that you could be the winner of this year’s best speech. The judge is the most popular girl in school Janet Cross Ward! Good luck to you Johnny!

Johnny: Thanks Hailey and good luck to you too, I like the sash, ha!

  Hailey and Johnny both thought that they were going to tie, but suddenly their father said, “Hailey, Johnny, come here please!” “Coming,” said Hailey and Johnny rushing towards their father, “Please help me open these packages the teacher gave you.”

Hailey: Hey, Johnny I love packages, what do you think it is?

Johnny: Don’t know Hailey, but I guess that we will just have to find out on our own by untying the knots to find out, because that is the best way.

  Johnny began examining the knot and to untie it; at last he untied the knot and found it inside a piece of paper, and on it were some words for the speech. Hailey on the other hand was trying to untie the knot, but couldn’t do it just like Johnny did; she became very, very frustrated.

Hailey: Oh! I wish that these silly people won’t tie these strings to tight; I can’t even get it untied! Johnny, how did you do it? I’m astonished?

Johnny: Oh, I just examined the knot to untie it, I love that idea!

  Hailey still couldn’t untie it; at last she made up her own mind.

Hailey: That it is, I shall cut it up, and besides it is a package, right? Oh how I wish I knew what is inside my package! Give a knife!

Johnny: Oh don’t cut it Hailey! What nice piece of string this is!

Hailey: What signifies a bit of thick string that is useless in the future?

Johnny: It is whipcord, Hailey; don’t you know anything that this string could be of use to us? This could even be our only hope in the future!

Hailey: Whipcord? Well then, what signifies a bit of whipcord; we don’t even need it in our speech! Besides, the whipcord is a package string.

  The speech began, Johnny read his lines perfectly, and even did a dance with his string. For Hailey she read her lines perfectly but couldn’t do any dance; and so the winner was no other than Johnny.

Hailey: Maybe the string made you lucky Johnny, but next time the string will cause you trouble; I am warning you again Johnny.

  The next month, there was an aim competition and Johnny is going to compete with his sister Hailey. And so it is Johnny Vs Hailey. The competition began; the only audience was Mr. Lolo.

Mr. Lolo: Okay, Hailey is first to aim with her bow; remember the rules, if her string breaks there is no allowed borrowing!

  And so Hailey was up, she aimed her bow at 8 and got 80 points; her second aim landed on 9; and so she got 90+80=170 points! She was about to aim until her string broke, Hailey had no other string to tie it onto, and so there a chance that the audience Mr. Lolo would say…

Mr. Lolo: You’re out, Hailey! No prize for you, Hahahahahaha; okay, Johnny your up! Wish you good luck! Break a leg! Ha!

  And so Johnny was up, he lifted up his arrow and aimed perfectly on ten, and so he got 100 points; his second aim missed and landed on 9; he got 100+90=190 points; he liked Hailey broke a string on the last aim too, and so Mr. Lolo had another chance of saying the word…

Mr. Lolo: You’re out! Ha! No prize for you too, Hahahahahaha; okay…

  Mr. Lolo didn’t even finished when Johnny pulled out the string from his pocket and tied it onto the bow; then he made his aim and won the prize. Hailey told Johnny after the competition…

Hailey: I’m sorry Johnny, I congratulate you! And you’re right, I should have kept the string; next time I will keep one if I have a chance.

修改后：

Hailey: Hey Johnny, you are looking extra cool today, yeah! I am sure that you could be the winner of this year’s best speech. The judge is the most popular girl in school Janet Cross Ward! Good luck to you Johnny!

Johnny: Thanks Hailey and good luck to you too, I like the sash, ha!

  Hailey and Johnny both thought that they were going to tie, but suddenly their father said, “Hailey, Johnny, come here please!” “Coming,” said Hailey and Johnny rushing towards their father, “Please help me open these packages the teacher gave you.”

Hailey: Hey, Johnny I love packages, what do you think it is?

Johnny: Don’t know Hailey, but I guess that we will just have to find out on our own by untying the knots to find out, because that is the best way.

  Johnny began examining the knot and untying it. At last he untied the knot and found it inside a piece of paper, and there were some words for the speech on it. Hailey on the other hand was trying to untie the knot, but couldn’t do it just like Johnny did. She became very, very frustrated.

Hailey: Oh! I wish that these silly people didn’t tie these strings so tight; I can’t even get it untied! Johnny, how did you do it? I’m astonished?

Johnny: Oh, I just examined the knot to untie it, I love that idea!

  Hailey still couldn’t untie it; at last she made up her own mind.

Hailey: That it is, I shall cut it up, and besides it is a package, right? Oh how I wish I knew what was inside my package! Give me a knife!

Johnny: Oh don’t cut it Hailey! What a nice piece of string this is!

Hailey: What does a bit of thick string that is useless in the future signify?

Johnny: It is whipcord, Hailey; don’t you know anything that this string could be of use to us? This could even be our only hope in the future!

Hailey: Whipcord? Well then, what does a bit of whipcord signify? we don’t even need it in our speech! Besides, the whipcord is a package string.

  The speech began, Johnny read his lines perfectly, and even did a dance with his string. For Hailey she read her lines perfectly but couldn’t do any dance; and so the winner was no other than Johnny.

Hailey: Maybe the string made you lucky Johnny, but next time the string will cause you trouble; I am warning you again Johnny.

  The next month, there was an aim competition and Johnny is going to compete with his sister Hailey. And so it is Johnny Vs Hailey. The competition began; the only audience was Mr. Lolo.

Mr. Lolo: Okay, Hailey is first to aim with her bow; remember the rules, if her string breaks there is no borrowing allowed!

  And so Hailey was up, she aimed her bow at 8 and got 80 points; her second aim landed on 9; so she got 170 points in total! When she was about to aim again, her string broke. Hailey had no other string to tie it onto.

Mr. Lolo: You’re out, Hailey! No prize for you, Hahahahahaha; okay, Johnny you up! Wish you good luck! Break a leg! Ha!

  Johnny was up, he lifted up his arrow and aimed perfectly on ten, and so he got 100 points.He misssed his seconed aim,and then landed on 9; he got 190 points in total. Just like Hailey, he broke the string on the last aim too.

Mr. Lolo: You’re out! Ha! No prize for you too, Hahahahahaha; okay…

  Mr. Lolo didn’t even finish when Johnny pulled out the string from his pocket and tied it onto the bow. Then he made his aim and won the prize. Hailey told Johnny after the competition…

Hailey: I’m sorry Johnny, I congratulate you! And you’re right, I should have kept the string. Next time I will keep one if I have a chance.

    四年级:欧阳雨鹭