Here is a story:
  Long long ago, there was a boy. He lived on a mountain with his monther.  One day, he had a dream.  He dreamed a lot of flowers in front of hie house, it is magic! He woreup and ran outside. Wow! how beautiful it was! Many roses and butterflies were there! He picked arose and kissed it. Suddenly, the rose escaped, a beautuful girl stood in front of him,  her smiled toward him. Her eyes are so beautiful like stars, also deep like lakes.  so the boy frozed……  I don’t know what happened later, I guess the girl is a flower elves. I want to share this story with you, dear teacher.
  Best wishes,  

修改后：
Dear teacher:
Do you like stories. I write to tell you a story.
Long long ago, there was a boy. He lived on a mountain with his mother.  One day, he had a dream.  He dreamed there were a lot of flowers in front of his house. He put his clother on and ran outside. Wow! How beautiful they were! There were plenty of roses and some butterflies were flying around them. He never saw such beautiful roses, so he picked up one and kissed it. Suddenly, the rose disappeared, but a beautiful girl stood in front of him, smiling. Her eyes were so beautiful like stars. The boy was surprised.  Then I woke up. I don’t know what happen next, but I guess the girl is a flower fairy. I want to share this story with you, dear teacher.
 
Best wishes,  
Lin

修改老师：Crystal 老师 

    初三:杨伊琳